Sexual Salvation or Repression?

Can lust ever be a truly female experience? The so-called “male gaze”—a feminist theory that explains the way women are portrayed in the media in order to please men—has infiltrated our society from all sides. Pornography is widespread; the perfect angle, perfect facial expression, perfect sounds, perfect arch, are all orchestrated to satisfy the male viewer. But where did this male-centric idea of lust come from? It certainly hasn’t always been there. Sappho, an ancient Greek poet, embraced the idea of lust and love from a female lens centuries ago. But, with the rise of the Church, lust became a sin, something that was dirty and wrong. Women who were forthright with their sexuality were berated, but the men that lusted after them did not receive as harsh a punishment. In more modern times, sex has become more prevalent and accepted in our society, but the values of the church still persist. The sinning of sex set the precedent for men profiting off of the sexual liberation of women while the women suffer. While women attempt to free themselves from patriarchal restraints the best they can, they are ultimately trapped in a closed system. Any act of sexual liberation still directly benefits men.

In the modern day there are a multitude of ways men can access their desired woman. The popularity of OnlyFans, a porn website where viewers can pay for specialized content, has surged in the past years. Girls can’t wait for their 18th birthday when they’re old enough to earn money for posting semi-nude to fully nude photos and videos that their subscribers have requested. Often these women feel as if they are in control, manipulating men to pay for access to their bodies, but really they are just an instrument of male fantasy. Men can pay for a sexy maid, a dominatrix, or even just a companion; sexual fantasies that only boost the esteem of the man. At the snap of their fingers men can access hundreds of women at their beck and call. There’s an illusion that these women are something special, partially because of the paywall, but really they could be anyone. Hundreds of anonymous women ready to please men—but not without a couple bucks.

The Victoria’s Secret runway show returned this year after addressing their past lack of diversity. This year’s show featured more body types: including trans, plus-sized, and older bodies. The production was supposed to revolve around female empowerment and women “holding the reins” but all it delivered was equal opportunity for objectification. No matter the age, size, or type of outfit, scantily-clad women stomping down the runway has always been about the male fantasy. This display of lingerie portrays women as a literal gift on a platter for a man—ready to unwrap!

However, some other recent restorations of feminine lust have worked. Addison Rae released the music video for her breakout song “Diet Pepsi” on August 9 of this year, joining the famed entourage of Charli xcx and Troye Sivan. Although Rae dons skimpy ensembles, she eats an ice cream sundae with her toes, and dances like a girl would dance alone in her bedroom: sometimes provocative but fun. The avant-garde nature of the video has garnered some criticism due to her nonconformity from the usual music video starlet. Although the video could be seen as sexual, it is not meant in that way; it’s just a girl having fun looking to connect with other girls. Her audience is mostly queer and female due to her famous friends' influence on her career, and she caters the video to them instead of straight men. In addition, in recent years female rappers have been embracing sexuality as much as their male counterparts have been celebrated for doing for decades. In 2020, Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion released the hit song “WAP” that soon became an internet sensation. With opening lyrics like, “certified freak, seven days a week,” the song is obviously a sexual anthem akin to the brash lyrics in male rappers’ songs. Some praised while others criticized the pair's overtly sexual lyrics and innuendos. The song emphasized that women can like sex without the suggestion that it is just to please men.

In the world we live in today, even restorations of female sexuality that mean well sometimes do not work in the way they intended. In our heteronormative patriarchal society it is hard to ever escape the “male gaze.” So can women ever truly be sexually liberated, or will sex always revolve around men and sin? In the society we currently exist in, I believe it is impossible to truly be perceived through a female gaze. But, it sounds like a world I would like to live in, and we may be headed towards this world with the recent developments we’ve seen. A world where women do not always have to think about how they are being perceived. A world where women can be sexual without feeling dirty and taken advantage of by men. A world for women where lust can just be fun.

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